


You Are My Sunshine

by Pfain Ryder (Cat_Moon)



Series: Angelfire Universe [15]
Category: Quantum Leap
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-06-07 18:06:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19474522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cat_Moon/pseuds/Pfain%20Ryder
Summary: When Sam's ex-wife Donna comes to visit Al at the Project, she brings a surprise with her.Part of the Angelfire universe, which I recommend reading in order since they build on each other.





	You Are My Sunshine

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published in Quantum Fire #3.

_The other night dear, as I lay sleeping_ _I dreamed I held you in my arms_ _When I awoke dear, I was mistaken_ _So I hung my head and I cried...*_

I sat in my office, staring at the computer screen but not seeing it. Instead, a moving picture played before my eyes, starring Sam Beckett.

I'd just found another one of his love notes, stuck into one of our private files where he knew I'd find it eventually. In a rare burst of manic romanticism, he'd stuck the damn things all over during his brief time home when I was leaping. They weren't very long, some merely said, 'I love you', but they'd always been enough to brighten my day.

Until now.

When we first declared our love for each other, Sam told me he'd be home soon. And, somehow, I'd believed him. Well, I don't know what his definition of _soon_ was, but mine wasn't ten months, thirteen days, and six hours, or anything higher. With the in-between leap time, it wasn't as long for him, and thankfully, he hadn't yet questioned me on the date here. Yeah, I still tried to protect him. I guess you can't teach an old dog new tricks.

_Well, maybe one._

My love for him was inevitable. I tried to fight it, knew the pain that would result, but I wasn't strong enough. And I couldn't protect _him_ from it, either. He'd ripped confessions out of both of us. Luckily, the leaps provided a distraction for him. I was okay while I was with him too, but times like this, waiting for him to leap into someone, were rough.

Tina asked me to move back in with her. She was a sweet girl and I loved her for the years of support she gave me, but it was easy to see through her. She thought I needed an eye kept on me. They all did, I saw them staring at me watchfully. It was because they knew it wasn't my best friend I waited for, it was my lover. That knowledge was in their eyes every time they looked at me. If it had been up to me, I might have kept the news to myself until Sam came home. As it turned out, Sam made my decision for me. I came home from my leap with a lot of surprises waiting for me.

Tina and I were still best of friends, in fact, there was even a night or two...but I tried not to use her like that. Most of the time, those rare times when they arose, I still didn't have any trouble finding a body to satisfy my needs.

Hell, it was six months before I could bring myself to seek a little outside release. _Me_. Kick in the butt, that's for sure...

The intercom buzzed, a welcome diversion from my thoughts. "Yes?"

"Admiral," my aide began, "Joe from the main gate just phoned. Dr. Donna Elesee is here to see you."

_Donna?_ "Tell him to send her through."

I sat back, waiting. _What can she want, now?_ Her divorce from Sam had been final for almost a year already, and the last I'd heard she was heading the Psych-Dream Project up in Oregon.

Soon the second buzz came, announcing her arrival. I gave the okay, taking a deep breath to face her. The door whooshed open and Donna came in. She hadn't changed much...

Except for the baby carrier--complete with baby--in her arms.

I jumped up with wide eyes, speechless. Did some quick arithmetic.

"Hello, Al," Donna greeted, aware of my scrutiny. She place the carrier on the desk.

My gaze followed, riveted. I cleared my throat, several times. "Is he...?" I asked, right to the point but not very eloquent.

Donna gave me a strange smile. "Yes. He's Sam's and...his name is Peter." Her tone of voice matched the smile she still half wore.

I came around the desk to get a closer look, feeling dizzy. As I approached the baby, I stared into those brown eyes. Unmistakably Sam's, yet there was something about them, something I felt I should recognize but couldn't. His hair was black, like Donna's. Even at this tender age he had a happy, mischievous face; an odd combination of innocence and impishness. The cheekbones were from him, the chin was hers. The nose must have belonged to a relative.

As I took in every nuance of the sweet face, his eyes held mine, the intelligence in them shining through.

"As you've obviously figured out," Donna continued quietly, "I got pregnant when Sam was home that time. When you simo-leaped." Again, a strange emphasis.

_Oh...simo..._

I heard my own sharp intake of breath, as I again stared into Sam's eyes. _My_ eyes. My nose...

“It's not possible...”

“I was rather shocked myself,” Donna said dryly. “But then after working for PQL all those years, I learned not to be totally surprised by _anything_ that happens around here. The tests prove it, Peter has your DNA too.”

"Oh my God..." I held onto the edge of the desk for support. Because of our merging, somehow...that baby was a part of both of us.

"Kick in the butt, huh Al?" Donna remarked, using my own expression against me.

The room swam for a moment, and I fought to keep an iron control over my emotions while in front of her. I looked down at my hands for a distraction. They were shaking. I tightened my grip on the desk until my knuckles turned white.

"I...this isn't easy for me," Donna was saying, "So I'm just going to say it right out. I've come here to...to leave Peter with you."

"Leave?" I croaked in a hoarse whisper, only partially comprehending. My mind was still missing in action.

"I guess you've heard I'm involved in a new project. It's very demanding to get something like that off the ground. Most days are twelve hours long. Things were okay for awhile, I had a great housekeeper. But she went back to England with her new husband and, well, I haven't found anyone good enough to take care of Peter. Except you."

I managed to recover somewhat, as the weight of what Donna was saying crashed down on me. "You mean you're deserting him," I stated, it coming out more harshly than I'd intended. I knew how it felt to have your mother walk out on you.

"I'm trying to explain, I can't take care of him--"

"You're his mother! You've got to try and work something out. It's not the quantity of the time, it's the quality. I could help you, and--"

"You're not listening to me, Al. I don't even have quality to offer right now. This is my one chance to do something on my own, with my life."

"Do you know how I felt about my mother leaving us?" I asked cuttingly.

"What about how she might have ended up resenting you?" Donna countered. "How much more of my life do you and Sam want to take from me?! Can't you see? I'm trying to save any relationship I might be able to have with my son later. But no matter what I say, you won't see that I'm making the best decision I can for him, will you? I'll always be the bad guy in your eyes. Despite what you're thinking, I care very much for Peter. I want him to have the best... that's why I'm leaving him with you!"

"I can't change your mind?" I asked quietly, absorbing her words. I wondered if Donna was resenting Peter. Was it because every time she looked at him, she would be reminded of what Sam had done, of the person he loved more than her?

"He's _yours_." Donna bent down to place a kiss on Peter's cheek. "You be a good boy for your daddy Al." Then she came up to me. "Take care of yourself, Al." She kissed me on the cheek as well.

Still tongue-tied, I watched her walk to the door and turn.

"Besides, you need them both more than I do." The door shut behind her. If there was one thing Donna Elesee was good at, it was making grand exits.

After she left, I sat down in the chair next to me, fell into, more like. I finally got up enough nerve to touch. I put my hands on Peter's waist. His hands, so tiny and delicate, reached out to me playfully. I tickled his foot. He laughed. So I tickled the other foot. All the while, letting it sink slowly in...Sam and I had a child.

_Ours..._

A poor little baby alone in the world, with a mother who's life meant more to her than his. I couldn't bear the thought of my son going through even a fraction of the pain I'd had to endure. I'd see to it that he had a life full of happiness and love.

I unstrapped him from the carrier and lifted Peter into my arms. His little arms went around my neck. The tears came them, as I hugged him to me. Knowing I held something very precious. I held a miracle.

XXX

One minute I was a bachelor with a lover who was lost in time, the next I was a father. I think the rest of the Project was almost as stunned as I was, but by the end of the day I realized one thing... Peter was going to have plenty of doting aunts and uncles. They took the news in stride, and the scientists in them were also fascinated by the implications of a child having two fathers.

One of whom was now standing over a crib, gazing down into the peaceful face of a new life he, in some strange way, was part of creating.

Wanting to help Peter adjust to his first night in his new home, I began singing him to sleep.

_"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray, you'll never know dear, how much I love you, please don't take my sunshine away..._

**the end**

*You Are My Sunshine, by Jimmie Davis and Charles Mitchell


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